Seamonster – Two Birds 7” EP (Gold Robot/Martyrs of Pop Records/Royal Rhino Flying)
One man, in this case Mr. Adrian Todd Webb, played everything the listener hears on all five tracks of this EP. Therefore, he had five chances to win the hook sweepstakes, and he does on the third track, but then the remaining two songs end up with the first two, with an effortless toss into that place where one would get hit by a car if we were talking reality rather than the popular idea of underground music … the middle of the road. “Bearsuit” is Mr. Webb (or Todd-Webb if the JC Penney exchange-counter demographic was responsible) elevated atop his one divorce from the type of man-wafer fare that echoed through dorm rooms as the Irrelevant 6 posse came grinding to a halt over ten years ago. If the great tastemaker phantom of all-powerful blog and Facebook-Favorites-List manipulation takes a liking to Mr. Webb, the unfortunate end could be mass panty-dampening amongst those under the age of 22 who wear panties, and amongst the ones who wear flip-flops on first dates and know no limits when it comes to verbal volume of bad humor? Well, they will display an equally as widespread trend of purchasing brand new acoustic guitars with the names Taylor and Martin adorning the headstocks. And more little ghost labels will pop up with names like It Is What It Is, or Stop Shitting On Our Good Times! Records. No longer will the lemmings have to hear about the days of troublesome culture-clutter like passion, danger, uncertainty, making a record with your last $600 because you are in love with its contents (be it yours or someone else’s), buying music you are totally unfamiliar with but the cover looks promising, not giving a shit because you genuinely give a shit where it counts, understanding that great bands can be both brutally abrasive and beautifully poignant within the same album, individuality … making room for everyone that’s awesome and rad. And the world will keep sucking. (http://gold-robot.com) (http://royalflyingrhino.wordpress.com) (http://www.martyrsofpop.com)
(Andrew Earles)
